I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize