one might say we're banned from that church
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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