If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
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