I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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