I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
