I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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