We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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