I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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