I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
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bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..