How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Randomize
