Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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