I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize