That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize