i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize
