One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Just high enough for therapy.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
