I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
