Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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