oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
