I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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