im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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