Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
