So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
