I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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