let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
