I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
