How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I believe in your delicious
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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