i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Pants are for mortals
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
