just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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