No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You can't special order awesome
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Randomize
