Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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