but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize
