been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
