yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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