So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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