Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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