The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
