i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Randomize