"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
