wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
