So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....