Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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