seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
