she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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