turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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