Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
