But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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