The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize