Moan for me like Helen Keller
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
