You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize