She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
