my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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